Life is…

Be kinds to others for everybody is fighting some kind of battle…

Taken from Yahoo Images

 We probably heard that once or few times in our lifetime. I am no exception and not to the saying either.

This year has been interesting to say the least. It starts off very good. Everything seems to start falls into places and I’m happy.

Comes March.. late march is when we heard about Kalia hearing problem. We learned that our beautiful baby girl is hard –hearing.

At that time, I don’t ever recall hearing more devastating news in my life.

I was so overwhelm with grief and guilt – for whatever reason. It wasn’t a good time.

 April came then things are slowly getting better again, both of my parents are here! I’m so happy I get to be a child again.

I love waking up to the sound of my parents talking about stuff over their breakfast.

It’s such a fond childhood memory where I wake up to see my dad with the newspaper and his cup of coffee on the table

And my mom sitting next to him while putting on make-up commenting on the news…

It’s comforting…

 Then June came, my dad have to leaves. He needs to go back to Indonesia to tidy up some business deal.

We made plan of him returning back in the fall so I can shows him beautiful CO during the fall season    

.. and its Tyra’s birthday as well.

We have so much plan….

 Then July came.. exactly one month after I say good bye to him at the airport, I have to say good bye to him again,..

This time forever…

God decided that it’s time for my dad to come back home for good. Leaving us here grieving, wondering why…

 Now we’re in October.. how time flew…

I survive the first holiday without my dad.. another one is around the corner..

 Leaves are changing, air is crispier. I wish my dad can see how beautiful it is here now..

I started remembering the plan we made…   promises I made to him.. 

 Life is cruel…

 Many – many times I wish I go back to my childhood.. When the life is so care free.

Playing and playing and playing with my friends…

 Life is cruel..

Then I remember something… a saying from Hadist

I said to Allah, I hate life.

Allah replied, who said love life. Love me and life will be beautiful.

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7 responses

  1. It has been such a difficult year for you and it makes me sad for you. You have a strength and a strong will that comes through in your writing and I know that with time it will get a little bit easier to let go of your dad –he will always be a part of you but maybe it won’t hurt quite as much. I lost my dad 18 years ago and there is not a day that goes by that I do not think of him so I understand the hole that a death can bring. Stay strong and be who you are—a beautiful woman who is stronger than she thinks she is.:-)

  2. Oh I feel your pain. I too loved to hear my folks talking downstairs when I first woke up, especially as an adult when I’d be visiting them. It is so comforting to know they are there, all is right with the world. And my Dad too died unexpectedly..and I know the shock and pain. I’m so sorry this has happened to you and your family. Please know I think about you a lot. It will be a difficult holiday season as you all adjust to the new normal. But know also that your Dad loves you every bit the same as he did before.

    Hugs to you and your family.

    And I hope your daughter’s hearing is not too damaged…and that you can find a solution to make her happy.

    Dawn

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